YESTERDAYS PICKS

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REDSKINS AT TITANS

OUR WINNER: TITANS

RAVENS AT CHARGERS

OUR WINNER: CHARGERS

DECEMBER 23, 2018 (THE SUNDAY SLATE)

GIANTS AT COLTS

Colts are one the hottest teams in the league. Giants are preparing their vacation plans. They will have their walking dead preventative defense going through the motions. Could this be the end of Eli Manning in a Giants uniform these final two weeks?

OUR PICK: COLTS

JAGUARS AT DOLPHINS

If I was a Jaguars fan, I think I would hang myself. Then again, killing myself over this group of losers is not the way to go about it. I would trade the team to London. Find a new team to root for. Perhaps the Dolphins which are playing way better than the Jags and are a Florida team. Who isn’t playing better than the Jags? I can not come up with an answer. Perhaps Houston University, suffering a 70-14 loss in the Armed Forces bowl game.

OUR PICK: DOLPHINS

FALCONS AT PANTHERS

Both teams are having a bad year on the field. It’s a very bad year also when you’ve stopped sniffing glue cold turkey and watch these teams on the field. Panthers are at home in this one. If their defense can repeat how they played last week versus the Saints, that will be the key in this one. The Cookie should be able to put more points on the Falcon defense than he did the Saints.

OUR PICK: PANTHERS

BUCCANEERS AT COWBOYS

Everybody was talking about how the Boys are playing so well. How they turned the corner. How they took control of that heap. The heap of flaming burning tires of a division. They feasted on a pile of crap just to get to the top. Then the Colts put them down like a horse with a broken leg. Cowboys play another inferior team this week. Phew, we can come off the ledge now that the Buccaneers are coming to town.

OUR PICK: COWBOYS

VIKINGS AT LIONS

The kittens usually roar at home if they even make any kind of noise at all. The Lions are too busy in a deep slumber, stretched out by the window getting some sun. Perfect animals for the petting zoo. The Vikings had a big win last week. Cousins with that huge contract has to lead his dragon ship through motor city and slay the tame beasts. To keep thriving for a better seed and hold on to what they’ve got. Lions might open their eyes, however they will take another snooze.

OUR PICK : VIKINGS

BROWNS AT BENGALS

Bengals did not look like the Bumbles against the Raiders last week. I expect them to return to old form against the Browns this week. The Browns are one of those teams you do not want to play right now. I think Cleveland has too many weapons for the Bumbles to handle. Everything in Browns country is coming together. I think Baker Mayfield has a huge game in this contest, a repeat like he did last time when these two teams met.

OUR PICK:BROWNS

BILLS AT PATRIOTS

Just what the Brady ordered. The Death Star spinning out of control. The Evil Empire, a flaming wreck of a football team. What do the Patriots need most? A division opponent where they chew up and spit out like a hillbilly with some tobacco in his mouth. The Patriots have owned the Bills and are much better at home. Love to see the Bills kick Brady and the Patriots while they’re down like this. The Evil Hooded mastermind genius will come up with a plan to get them out of this rut.

OUR PICK: PATRIOTS

PACKERS AT JETS

Poor Aaron Rodgers will be home for the playoffs. He’ll take it out on the Jets. I’m sure he’s too busy to care these next few weeks, picking out a new head coach. His master plan is just starting. I think it will be the State Farm guy who will take over as the Packers’ new coach.

OUR PICK: PACKERS

TEXANS AT EAGLES

Nick Foles is back and now will lead the Eagles back to the playoffs and back to the Superbowl. Then they wake up from a drunken slumber with a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak cuddled between their arms. Cheese all over the covers. It was good while it lasted. Texans go into Philly and come out with a victory.

OUR PICK EAGLES

RAMS AT CARDINALS

Rams need the Cardinals right now. They are going through dark times right now. They feel like they are cornered. They have no answers. Cardinals are like that old girlfriend you can call up late in the wee hours of the morning. Get your booty call. Get your head clear and give you just enough spark to re-light the torch and get back to your winning ways. Yes, Rams love red heads.

OUR PICK : RAMS

BEARS AT 49ERS

49ers have been very sneaky. Playing possum pretending they are dead on the road looking like they were run down by a bus. Then as they are about to be picked up, they jump at you and bite you in the neck. Rip out your Adams Apple. Then you find yourself losing the game as you bleed out. The Bears are not buying what the 49ers are selling. Bears will devour this 49ers road kill and that will be the last peep we hear from them.

OUR PICK:DA BEARS

STEELERS AT SAINTS

I think the Steelers used up all of their energy and resources just to beat the bully. The Gooch, who is Tom Brady, who has been tormenting them for years in the school yard. Steelers are different on the road. The Saints are a different animal inside the dome. I think the Saints reload and come out with a fire power the Steelers will be unprepared for. A fight where the Steelers will think it was a bad idea to bring a knife to a gun fight.

OUR PICK: SAINTS

CHIEFS AT SEAHAWKS

Seahawks thrive at home. Chiefs coming off a loss to the Chargers. Seahawks lost last week. Which coach will prevail, Pete Carol or Andy Reid? I’m betting on Andy Reid. The Chiefs’ losses have come from tough opponents. Seattle lays an egg in San Francisco. I think the Chiefs offense will be very hard to stop for the young defense Seattle has. The Chiefs’ defense will make a few stops of their own.

OUR PICK:CHIEFS

BRONCOS AT RAIDERS

Jon Gruden wants the number one pick overall. Broncos should help him out with that. That’s the gift that keeps on given in Gruden’s mind.

OUR PICK:BRONCOS