The rebirth of the USFL rolled out their league last week in a grand fashion in their safe pace in the state of Alabama. The quarterback play, as we expected, was weak. The play on the field in general was worth watching. Interesting rules. Flying drones. On the field interviews. The announcers drawn out by the coaches’ play calling in the headsets that are heard on the television. Universal cheerleaders. Every team had a nightmarish-looking mascot. Hide the kids & put your mom in the trunk when they take the field. Chicken Salad or Pizza?

You know food can be a touchy subject. Stay away from the politics and you have yourself a deal.

WEEK TWO USFL POWER RANKINGS ROLLING OUT

#1.

NEW ORLEANS BREAKERS (1-0) UP 1 SPOT

The Breakers really impressed me week one with a top notch defense. They are a two-headed monster backfield and a quarterback that is going to get better. Even the Breakers special teams blocked a punt. First the defense front seven led by former University Georgia Bulldog Davin Bellamy had three sacks. Bellamy may be the best defensive player in the league.

In the NFL the Bills and Cowboys have themselves a Diggs. With the last name Diggs, you must be expected to make big plays. The Breakers’ Diggs did that.

Vontae Diggs stole the show with 7 solo tackles and an interception pick six. The running game was electric for the Breakers. Both running backs had a touchdown. Jordan Ellis averaged 4.9 yards a carry as he rushed for 89 yards. TJ Logan Jr. had 56 yards on the ground and also chipped in on a two point conversion that went through the hands of a Philadelphia Stars defender. He caught it and converted. In his first professional coaching debut, Breakers Head Coach Larry Fedora’s team gets the win.

#2.

TAMPA BAY BANDITS UP 1 SPOT

Tampa Bay seems to be the sports landscape capital of the World. The Lightning in the NHL have won two Stanley Cups. Tom Brady’s Buccaneers won the Superbowl in his first season in Tampa Bay. The Rays are a great team but lost in the World Series two seasons ago. Last year the Rays were knocked off early in the MLB post-season. So now the experts have the Tampa Bay Bandits as the best team in the rebirth of the USFL. I think the Bandits have the best quarterback in the entire USFL league, named Jordan Ta’amu.

Is Ta’amu the best quarterback in the league? The Bandits played a great first half versus the Maulers last Monday night. In the second half, the Bandits did nothing. Maulers quarterback play was not very good as the eye test tells me that and on the scoreboard they put up 3 points. Maulers had 3 more points than the Bandits in the second half. Jordan Ta’amu had a great day mostly in the first half as he finished 20-32 for 185 passing yards with 1 touchdown pass. Ta’amu however had two interceptions. Not crowning the Bandits the championship automatically, because they are from Tampa Bay and have a quarterback that threw two interceptions and disappeared in the second half. I need to see more from the Bandits, but they should be one of the better teams in the league. Right now they are behind the Breakers.

#3.

BIRMINGHAM STALLIONS UP 1 SPOT

The Birmingham Stallions coming in, we know have the home field advantage as all games of the USFL are being played in Alabama. Stallions being the first game on the docket drew the biggest crowd on Saturday night. Stallions made it interesting as they had to fight back and made a comeback and secured the win at the last minute. Stallions had the dueling quarterbacks to find out that perhaps the second one was better than the first one. Alex McGough looked good early on as he threw a touchdown pass. Early on J’mar Smith looked bad and got better during the game filling in for perhaps an injured McGough. Smith led the comeback as he finished off the Generals going 11-21 for 156 yards with one touchdown pass. Quarterback controversy? Maybe. I like the Stallions defense as one of the better units in the league. Scooby Wright lived up to the hype.

Scooby forced a turnover as he forced a fumble in a key situation of the game. This was a turning point for the Stallions. The Stallions uniforms look very similar to the ESU Timberwolves in the movie The Program.

#4.

HOUSTON GAMBLERS UP 3 SPOTS

I was not really impressed with the Gamblers. Offensively the Gamblers quarterback situation was not very good. I thought former Northwestern star quarterback Clayton Thorson would have gave me more. Thorson started off well with a touchdown pass to wide receiver Isaiah Zuber. Thorson, a duel threat, only had 4 yards with his legs. Thorson finished his Houston debut hitting 9-17 passes for 73 yards with the touchdown pass and an interception. Houston still won the game because….

Jeff Fisher and the Panthers gave the Gamblers an early Christmas gift. Gamblers found the scoreboard with a defensive score with the ole scoop and run on a fumble. Maybe Fisher’s team had the chicken instead of the pizza as the Panthers quarterback could not grasp the ball on a shot gun formation as he fumbled more than once. Thought it was finger licking good. Gamblers scored all their points in the first half. Panthers fumbled the ball on a chance at a game winning drive at the end. A special mention is Donald Payne Jr., the heart and soul of the Gamblers defense, had 15.5 tackles with 13 of them solo. He’s just a beast on the Houston’s defense.

#5.

MICHIGAN PANTHERS Down 4 spots

The Michigan Panthers were unlike any of the coached teams of Jeff Fisher of the past. Panthers showed no discipline on the field as they were fighting each other.

I thought from the beginning the Panthers would be one of the best teams in the USFL as I had them number one in the power rankings coming in.

I thought the quarterbacks for Michigan would be their strength. Former number one draft pick for the Denver Broncos, Paxton Lynch, was hot garbage. The Panthers gave him a series or two. Lynch completed 2 passed out 5 attempts for 1 yard with an interception. Then Shea Patterson, who will and should be a top quarterback in this league, completed 68% of his passes. He had a 104.1 rating as he passed for 192 yards while throwing one touchdown pass. However Patterson had chicken grease on his fingers or something, fumbling three snaps in shot gun formation. Plus took three sacks. The Gamblers to me were waiting to give the game to the Panthers but they would not accept the win.

#6.

PHILADELPHIA STARS Same

The Philadelphia Stars played well in their first game. The Stars did some great stuff in all phases of the game. Bryan Scott behind center is definitely one of the better quarterbacks in the league as he finished 25-26 for 202 passing yards throwing 1 touchdown pass with one interception. Stars generated a nice running game to go along with Scott at quarterback. Chris Rowland was a nice security blanket for Bryan Scott as he caught seven balls for 74 yards doing his best Wes Welker imitation.

The Stars defense played well and are no slouch as New Orleans earned their points in the first week against them. I think when I see more, the Stars will be in the top half of the league.

#7.

NEW JERSEY GENERALS (0-1) UP 1 SPOT

I thought the Generals should have won on Opening night of the USFL as the team led the entire game only to lose to the Stallions in the last minute. The Generals were using dueling quarterbacks in the opener. That and the kicking game cost them a victory. Luis Perez may be the best bowler quarterback behind center all-time in any Spring football league ever established. Head Coach Mike Riley did not need to give De’Andre Johnson playing time when Perez was doing well as he finished the day going 13-18 for 143 yards & two touchdown passes. Perez had a nice thing going on with with his wide receiver Randy Satterfield who had 5 catches 100 yards and a score. Back up De’Andre Johnson had a rushing touchdown and had 98 yards on the ground. I think the Generals should ride with the hotter hand instead of mixing and matching. Generals defense can be scored on as the Stallions mounted a comeback in the first ever game of the rebirth of the USFL. Shalom Luani, one defender from that Generals defensive, stood out with 8 solo tackles and an interception.

If the USFL has an All-Madden team of some kind, Luani is one of my guys.

#8.

PITTSBURGH MAULERS (0-1) Down 3 spots

Maulers running back De’Veon Smith wanted pizza over the team’s choice of chicken salad at the team dinner.

Smith may have pulled a Jeff Spicoli in the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Spicoli’s teacher Mr. Hand did not like it. Head Coach Kirby Wilson of the Maulers did not like Smith’s pizza idea either.

De’Veon Smith would end up being cut from the Maulers after that incident. I think Head Coach Kirby Wilson needs to pick one man behind center. Either Josh Love or Kyle Lauletta. One has to be pizza and the other chicken salad. The Maulers were committed to the run. With dueling quarterbacks, it kills drives and any kind of momentum waiting for a guy to knock off the rust. Kyle Lauletta went 2-11 in passing attempts for 8 yards. Why Lauletta get 11 pass attempts is baffling. Maulers have a nice defense as Bandits scored only 17 points in the game; all in the first half of the contest.