LETS ROLL OUT WEEK THREE WITH PLENTY OF CRAZY IN THE NFL AND ON OUR OWN PART INDEED.

#1.NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS 2-0 (SAME) Last week the Evil Empire wiped out another planet. As the death star struck a blast and wiped out all the Dolphin people on the planet Miami.

Since when do the Patriots have morals? They must have a set of standards to cut Antonio Brown as more women rise out of the woodwork to accuse the receiver of raping them. Perhaps New England has no way of covering this scandal up and had to cut ties before answering questions every day about RAPE GATE!!

#2.KANSAS CITY CHIEFS 2-0 (SAME) Patrick Mahomes is a one man army.

You can say like a young John Rambo just taking it to the enemy each week. The Chiefs have not been running the ball very well. They have some injuries with some of the play-makers. Great quarterbacks make whoever the play-maker is out on the field, much better. Mahomes is doing that. One key factor is the Chiefs defense is way better then it was to start the season last year. So far those defensive moves in the off-season seem to be working.

#3.BALTIMORE RAVENS 2-0 (UP 1 SPOT) Ravens have the number one offense in the league. They have the number two defense in the league as well. How is this possible? Playing the Dolphins inflates those numbers. Then the Cardinals, they came back down to earth but still won. I need to see the Ravens play a better team before I can judge this team fully. Week three Ravens versus the Chiefs will help me see whether these birds are a contender or a pretender.

#4.SEATTLE SEAHAWKS 2-0 (UP 7 SPOTS) Most of my top ten teams in last week’s power rankings fell like a house of cards. I like how Seattle flew to Pittsburgh and knocked off the Steelers. Taking out Big Ben helps. Pete Carol has that defense playing well. Then Russell Wilson reminds me of Derek Jeter of the Yankees. Hate the Yankees, but Jeter and Wilson can carry their team especially in big games. It’s all the little things Wilson does. Things that are not in stat sheets.

Russell Wilson is not your typical fantasy football quarterback unless wins count. One week he can toss for over three hundred yards. Next week he can just toss for 150. Seattle won on the road and if they do that regularly, this team with the changed landscape in the NFC, with key injuries, they might come out as one of the top two teams when it comes to the playoffs.

#5.GREEN BAY PACKERS 2-0 (UP 7 SPOTS) Packers are another team that made a sudden jump. I might have to say the Packers defense is definitely legit. Against the Bears I thought it was just bad quarterbacking. Then they shut down a high power offense in the Vikings last week. Vikings offense rolled in week one like a well oiled machine. Of course they have Aaron Rodgers on offense. When is the football agent in those Aaron Rodgers State Farm commercials going to throw the insurance agent off the top of the building?

RELEASE THE MAYHEM ALREADY !!!!

#6.DALLAS COWBOYS 2-0 (UP 2 SPOTS) So far so good if you like the Cowboys. They have looked really good the first two weeks. They have played nothing but cream puffs.

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That’s the way to sell your team performance revenge of the nerds style. Enjoy a cream pie and find a naked cheer leader on the plate. Have a few pies and fans will not doubt you as you played the Giants and Redskins, now on deck are the Dolphins. Jerry Jones spinning things in Dallas. When they finally play somebody, that’s when I want to see if these Cowboys are… HOW ABOUT THOSE COWBOYS!!!

#7. LA RAMS 2-0 (UP 2 SPOTS) When you shoot a zombie in the head it goes down. When you mangle the Saints quarterback, Drew Brees, the whole operation falls apart. For sure I thought the Rams would be beaten like an Adrian Peterson kid last Sunday. Rams early on are showing they are still an elite team. I thought they would have a hiccup this season. I loved how the Rams played most of the season last year. Then at the end they looked sketchy. I thought they should have been beaten by the Saints in the championship game. As most thought, the Rams mugged their way into the big game. Can you forgive me for doubting your team?

#8.MINNESOTA VIKINGS 1-1 (DOWN 3 SPOTS)

In the loss to Green Bay, I see another weapon emerging to the table. Don Beebe’s son Chad. Minnesota already has Adam Thielein and Stefon Diggs. With Beebe emerging this is a very nice receiving core Vikings have established. Vikings dug themselves a hole early last week and could not quite fully comeback but made a game out of it going down 21-0. Vikings have a ton of talent on both sides of the football. It will all depend on how Kirk Cousins does. One week he looks to be one of the best in the league. The next week he’s average. He might be just awful this weekend.

#9.LA CHARGERS 1-1 (DOWN 2 SPOTS) Chargers again having kicking problems. Kicking woes that cost them last week versus the Lions. Both the Lions and Chargers like to beat themselves so you’d figure this game would end in a tie. With all the talent on both teams, the Chargers took a step back last week from not converting on special teams. It’s a shame because I’ve noticed many X Charger kickers in the AAF that were not too bad. Yes, they had problems because that’s why they went to the AAF in first place. Chargers need to hire a soccer dude to solve their problem in the kicking game that has lingered more than one season.

#10.NEW ORLEANS SAINTS 1-1 (DOWN 7 SPOTS) With Drew Brees out with an injury, does this derail the Saints team in 2019? Could Teddy Bridgewater ride the ship and buy enough time for the Saints to hold down the fort while they wait for Brees to heal? It will not be pretty. It will probably be very ugly. The Saints will tread water and still have a chance when Drew returns.

#11. PHILADELPHIA EAGLES 1-1 (Down 5 spots) The Eagles were running down the road and had seven women on their minds before they made their comeback versus the Redskins. Then the Falcons stung them last week on Sunday night. Lots of injuries the Eagles suffered as well. Will this Nick Foles off-season move haunt this team even though he was injured in week one with the Jaguars? Carson Wentz needs to have a big game. He needs to take this team on its back and show the Philadelphia and Eagle nation he is the guy. He can’t be the Eagle man showing his low rates.

#12.CHICAGO BEARS 1-1 (UP 1 SPOT) DA BEARS only moved up one spot. I am scratching my head with such a drastic move. However they need to iron out things versus the Redskins to get on the right track. If they falter or have obvious problems then it will be a long season. It’s not the kicker. We know it’s not the defense. Mitch Trubisky’s arm is what we are questioning along with Matt Nagy’s War and Peace playbook that is not cutting the mustard.

#13. INDIANAPOLIS COLTS 1-1 (up two spots) Colts get on the winning side of things and even their record up at 1-1 versus the Titans. We do not know what the Titans are. Is it the team that beat up on Cleveland? Or did the Browns give the Titans that game gift wrapped. We do know the Colts even without Andrew Luck. This team is still good. They are not going away.

#14.HOUSTON TEXANS 1-1 SAME I think I was more impressed with the Texans loss to the Saints than their first victory versus the Jags last week. Sometimes you have to have win UGLY to get on the board.

#15.SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS 2-0 (UP 2 SPOTS) The 49ers are undefeated. Jimmy Garroppolo is still standing. He is not out for the remainder of the season.

49ER NATION IS WATCHING JIMMY…. Hoping Jimmy can play the whole season. If he can they might be in the thick of things when it comes down to the playoffs.

#16.CLEVELAND BROWNS 1-1 (SAME) Browns finally win… A game that if they lost would be more problems than Lebron going to south beach. If you would of lost to the Jets, the league would have kicked the Browns out. It would been justified even to Browns fans. Odell Beckham Jr. the dog he is made a nice grab on MONDAY NIGHT!!!

#17.BUFFALO BILLS 2-0 (UP 1 SPOT) CONGRATULATIONS THE BUFFALO BILLS ARE KING OF NEW YORK WITH A SWEEP OF THOSE JERSEY SHORE TEAMS!!! Love that defense !!!

#18.TENNESSEE TITANS 1-2 (DOWN 7 SPOTS) Titans are back down to earth with a loss to the Colts. Week one, the big win versus the Cleveland Browns looks more like a fluke than anything. Now the countdown to Jay Fielder the back up quarterback to take over is officially started. Then you get beaten by the Jags on Thursday with a rookie quarterback.

#19.ATLANTA FALCONS 1-1 (UP 6 SPOTS) In week one the dirty Birds were left for dead on the highway of life. The Vikings crushed them. In week two they take down the Eagles in a song of desperado. They then see Drew Brees is out for weeks with an injury. The tale of two weeks. Atlanta fans and Falcons players are no longer walking the ledge in their zombie state.

#20.TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS 1-1 (SAME) Since the Buccaneers won their first game in the second Thursday game of the season, I did not have the heart to move them out of their 20th spot. The next power rankings though I will move them probably in the back where they most likely will fall.

#21.OAKLAND RAIDERS 1-1 (DOWN 2 SPOT) Raiders are another team that came back down to earth with their first win in the opening week. Kansas City will do that to many teams in the league. However Chucky and Raiders nation, they did not look terrible in their first loss as you pointed that out in several games last season.

#22.JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS 1-1 (SAME) Jaguars finally get a win and it was done with a rookie quarterback. Are the Titans just a bad football team? Or was it just a short week that gave the Jaguars their first victory of the year. We know it was not the head coach.

#23.ARIZONA CARDINALS 0-1-1 (DOWN 2 SPOTS) We know the Kyle Murray ERA came back down to earth. However the Ravens did not win over the Cardinals in a big score. Who knows what we will see each week with Kyle Murray. Next week might be the first win ever for the young rookie. Cardinals as a team are not bad. Kyle Murray will be interesting player to watch week to week. Wins will appear at some point for the red birds.

#24.DETROIT LIONS 1-0-1 (UP 7 SPOTS) Lions OH MY… Big upset in week two over the Chargers. This does not shock me. Lions are notorious for winning big games with upsets early in the season at home. Remember the Patriots last year. They had a victory in week one which they let the Cardinals sneak back into the game and settled for the tie.The Lions are still UNDEFEATED in the NFC CENTRAL. Only the Lions and Packers can say that.

#25.CAROLINA PANTHERS 0-2 (DOWN 2 SPOTS) Cam Newton is at the bottom of the cookie jar crumbled up hurt and ready to be discarded in the trash. If you’re a Panther fan. If you’re head coach Ron Rivera, you are praying.

Panthers need Kyle Allen to save this franchise. To save Ron Rivera’s job. If Kyle Allen comes in and does well what would this do to Cam Newton? Can you trade him? Hope no teams I like would take him. Give his stench to the Packers most might agree with that. The Panthers defense is really good. If this kid just stays away from the Newton bone headed mistakes this can work. We do not know how this will play out. It could be the miracle in Charlotte. Or the dark clouds will continue to follow the Panthers.

#26.CINCINNATI BENGALS (0-2) (DOWN 2 SPOTS) Fool me once, but you will not fool me again. Bengals looked well in week one. They played in Seattle and lost by one point. Then at home they turn into a pumpkin at high noon and implode with a dud versus the 49ers. The bumbles have no running attack. The defense can not get off the field. The Red rifleman Andy Dalton also has injuries to some of his play makers. It’s quite the same recipe for Skyline Chili, put it in the blender. Hard to say they have something working at this time.

#27.PITTSBURGH STEELERS (0-2) (DOWN 1 SPOT) Steelers got rid of their trouble makers in Bell and Brown. Now the collapse of Big Ben crumbling down on the Steelers carpet and out for the season. If I was the Steelers, don’t stop. Put head coach Mike Tomlin on the chopping block, another one that needs to be shown the door. If Mason Rudolph shows you something this season at quarterback, in for Big Ben. It’s time to get rid of Big Ben Roethlisberger in the off-season. Go back to the drawing board. Find a head coach that can create a great defense that Steel-town has been missing for a very long time. If Rudolph is the man, he has some nice play makers around him to get this rebuild done very quickly.

#28.DENVER BRONCOS 0-2 (DOWN 1 SPOT) Broncos held their own versus the Bears last week in a game of yellow flags. Bears offense is struggling, nothing to write home about because you stopped them most of the game. Bears still got the last laugh with the game winning kick at game regulation. Broncos offense with Joe Flacco is sputtering like Al Bundy’s old dodge on life support.

Broncos need a quarterback to get hot like her.

THAT’S THE KEY TO THE SUPERBOWL HOT!!!!

#29.WASHINGTON REDSKINS 0-2 (SAME) I kept the Redskins in the same spot because they were the same team they were in week one, that they were in week two. They can not play the full 4 quarters of a game. They play a decent half. They take the next half off for whatever reason. The defense is struggling. Case Keenum is driving the car on flat wheels when it comes to the offensive side of things. When are they going to switch their quarterback? Maybe wait after you play the Bears. That did not work well for Josh Rosen when he played for the Cardinals and got his feet wet versus the monsters of the midway.

#30.NEW YORK JETS 0-2 (DOWN 2 SPOTS) You can probably argue on your bar stool about which New York City team is worse. Each person would have a valid point. Jets defense can actually tackle somebody. However the Jets are thin at quarterback as Sam Darnold is out with mono, some would say the kissing disease.

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Perhaps Sam Darnold is a boob man and did not see her eyes. Did not notice her lips. The lips that would cripple your football season. Where’s back up Josh McCown? He retired and then the Eagles convinced him to come back. Now the Jets are flying broken down Mig 16’s, not their usual F-15 fighter Jets. It will be years before they become Stealth like.

#31.NEW YORK GIANTS 0-2 (DOWN 1 SPOT) This team has no defense to stop the other team. The offense is sputtering so they are benching their legendary quarterback, Eli Manning. Manning is happy about the decision. He will not waive his no trade clause. He stays with the team as a back up. Like all big companies, he trains his own replacement. Meanwhile Daniel Jones gets his first NFL start this weekend. If you’re a Giants fan, the only good thing you can say he has some interesting weapons around him. Playmakers which can help his development faster.

#32. MIAMI DOLPHINS 0-2 (SAME) What would you be excited for in Miami after two weeks of humiliation on the field? First pick in the draft next season. Plus you get first pick in the waivers and maybe find some gems from other teams throwing out scraps of players they don’t want.

To be a a bum in Miami is like the big show in the homeless world. But the bums in Miami found their defensive savor Taco Charlton bringing his talents to South Beach after being dumped in recycling by the Dallas Cowboys.

LAST WEEK WE WENT 9-7

FOR THE SEASON WE ARE AT 19-13

THURSDAY NIGHT OUR RECORD IS PERFECT AT 0-3

ON MONDAY NIGHT OUR RECORD IS 2-1

WEEK THREE

THURSDAY NIGHT GAME

TITANS AT JAGUARS

OUR PICK TITANS WRONG

THE SUNDAY SLATE

LIONS AT EAGLES

OUR PICK: EAGLES

JETS AT PATRIOTS

OUR PICK:PATRIOTS

RAIDERS AT VIKINGS

OUR PICK:VIKINGS

RAVENS AT CHIEFS

OUR PICK: CHIEFS

FALCONS AT COLTS

OUR PICK:FALCONS

BRONCOS AT PACKERS

OUR PICK:PACKERS

DOLPHINS AT COWBOYS

OUR PICK:COWBOYS

BENGALS AT BILLS

OUR PICK:BILLS

GIANTS AT BUCCANEERS

OUR PICK:BUCCANEERS

PANTHERS AT CARDINALS

OUR PICK:PANTHERS

STEELERS AT 49ERS

OUR PICK 49ERS

SAINTS AT SEAHAWKS

OUR PICK:SEAHAWKS

TEXANS AT CHARGERS

OUR PICK:CHARGERS

RAMS AT BROWNS

OUR PICK:RAMS

BEARS AT REDSKINS

OUR PICK:BEARS

LAST WEEK STATS

OVERALL 10-6 RECORD 16 GAMES

THURSDAY NIGHT O-2

MONDAY NIGHT 1-1

FOR THE YEAR 10-7

THURSDAY NIGHT

BUCCANEERS AT PANTHERS

OUR PICK: PANTHERS

Yes, our Momma always told not to have a cookie before dinner because it would spoil your appetite. Momma was right, the Fig Newton did spoil my dinner and keeps us perfect on Thursday night 0-2 for the year.

9-15-19 THE SUNDAY SLATE

COWBOYS AT REDSKINS

OUR PICK: COWBOYS

Redskins only like to play one half of football. Will the old man suit even up for the Redskins. Adrian Peterson might be still all pimped up with rage with nothing to spank.

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Cowboys will gladly thank the Redskins and take another victory.

COLTS AT TITANS

OUR PICK:COLTS

Colts have the hex on the Titans over last few years. Even though that was all with Andrew Luck. Sometimes it’s just the uniform you can’t beat.

SEAHAWKS AT STEELERS

OUR PICK: STEELERS

These are two teams that do not do well on the road. Home cooking is how these teams win most of their games. Today in Steeltown, a yummy Hawk platter from the sea with some pierogis on the side as Steelers win their first game of the year.

BILLS AT GIANTS

OUR PICK:BILLS

Bills become king of New York when they sweep the other two teams in their state. Wait. Don’t the Giants and Jets play in Jersey? Bills are the King of New York. Bills have a defense and the Giants don’t, sums it up.

VIKING AT PACKERS

OUR PICK VIKINGS

Vikings look like a whole different animal last week. Not buying what the cheese heads are selling on defense. These two teams usually battle all the way to the end when they play. Vikings escape at the end as they cut the head off the big cheese himself, Aaron Rodgers.

CHARGERS AT LIONS

OUR PICK:CHARGERS

Chargers were very good on the road last season. Lions are due for a rebound since they let the Cardinals back in that game last week. I think the Chargers are far too talented to get beat by the Lions.

CARDINALS AT RAVENS

OUR PICK:RAVENS

I do not see the Ravens putting up another 50 burger in week two. I do see the Ravens being able to slow down second half Kyle Murray. This would be the game where Murray will look more like a rookie than what he did versus the Lions.

RAIDERS AT CHIEFS

OUR PICK: CHIEFS

Raiders played well in week one. Chiefs did not look rusty. I can see this one going back and forth with both teams able to score. The flood gates will open for the Chiefs late in this one to bring Chucky back to reality in Raider nation.

SAINTS AT RAMS

OUR PICK:SAINTS

The Saints get their revenge against that Rams who mugged New Orleans to get to the Superbowl last season. Drew Brees will play the Punisher in this ultimate revenge game.

BEARS AT BRONCOS

OUR PICK: DA BEARS

Thought about how the Denver coach, Vic Fangio, knows all about the Bears. Since he created the defense in Chicago as a coach there for a few years. Knows what Matt Nagy’s playbook is all about. However Joe Flacco is the Broncos quarterback. Bears win their first game on the road.

EAGLES AT FALCONS

OUR PICK:EAGLES

Falcons looked very bad in week one. I can see the Falcons playing much better. I think Philadelphia will win this game in Atlanta in a dog fight. The Eagle will soar higher than the Falcon.

49ers AT BENGALS

OUR PICK BENGALS

I like the Bengals in this one. 49ers won last week because their defense had two pick sixes. I think Jimmy Garoppolo is still trying to knock off the rust. I think Andy Dalton is just better right now. I think the Bengal defense will be able to make Jimmy uncomfortable. Hope Jimmy at least goes and tries some Skyline Chili after the loss.

PATRIOTS AT DOLPHINS

OUR PICK PATRIOTS

Is this even fair? Does the NFL have a slaughter rule? Will the Dolphins have any fans after this blood bath? Are the Dolphins an endangered species? This week they are.

JAGUARS AT TEXANS

OUR PICK:TEXANS

The same ole song and dance with the Jaguars. They need another quarterback. Nick Foles most likely is done for the year. Now they have a rookie quarterback making his first start in Houston… Texans win their first game of the season in this one.

BROWNS AT JETS

OUR PICK:BROWNS

Browns need to stop shooting themselves in the foot in week one. Jets they should be able to handle on both sides of the ball. Cleveland is far the more talented team in this match up. If the Browns lose this one, you may have to ask yourself if you hired the right guy if you are Cleveland management.

Our first power ranking of the season in the NFL. We did not hold anything back in our first addition of the 2019 season. We are hoping some team will straighten out the galaxy and prevail over the dark side, who we have at number one. We have plenty of stuff to poke fun at Antonio Brown on. Can the Steelers and Raiders go on without Antonio Brown? Are the Dolphins that bad? Are the Ravens that good? Walking dead in Atlanta. What happened to the Bears?

FIRST OUR VERSION OF… GINGER OR MARY ANNE ?

KELLY OR JESSICA?

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WHAT MOVIE QUARTERBACK WOULD YOU WANT LEADING YOUR TEAM?

JOE KANE RENO HIGHTOWER SHANE FALCO OR WILLIE BEAMAN

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#1.NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS 1-0 When the GRONK retired, the song, “This is the End,” played in my head from the Doors. Finally the end of this dynasty once and for all. Patriots in week one destroy the Steelers and picked up another despicable character to their roster. You can say one of the best wide outs in the galaxy.

As you can see the Evil Empire picked up Antonio Brown pictured up above with his old trainer he like to cuddled with after a workout. Will the Patriots have another deflate gate going down with Antonio Brown’s departure from Oakland done in such a class-act way. All NFL players are classy people and great citizens in their community. My senses tell me the man in the hoodie on the sidelines created such a plan to land Brown.

#2.KANSAS CITY CHIEFS 1-0 To think the Chicago Bears could have drafted Patrick Mahomes without giving up picks to move up one spot with the 49ers to get Mitch Trubisky. Chiefs in my opinion should have gotten to the Superbowl last season. One play in that game versus the Patriots in the playoffs would have sealed the deal. Andy Reid, the Jesus of the Midwest, will resurrect Shady McCoy who they picked up after the Bills dumped him like the weekly trash. Mahomes makes people around him better as Sammie Watkins looks like the best receiver in the league in week one. The Chiefs are my rebel alliance to defeat the Evil Empire this season.

#3.NEW ORLEANS SAINTS 1-0 Saints were involved clearly in the best game of the week on Monday night with the Texans. Drew Brees looked sharp and that Saints offense looks like a well-oiled machine again. They replaced Ingram with a Murray from O’Reillys auto parts, like going with a different oil filter. Saints defense seems to always come up with a big play every game to stop the other opponent. If they don’t get robbed by the referees, they are my pick to get to the Superbowl from the NFC.

Saint fans honoring all the great referees around the league in week one in the Superdome.

#4. BALTIMORE RAVENS 1-0 Are the Ravens this good or are the Miami Dolphins this bad after week one? Ravens put up 59 points with over 600 yards of offense on the fins to start the season. Lamar Jackson was chucking the rock all over the yard instead of their usual wishbone option running-the-ball-down-your-throats style of offense. I thought the Ravens lost too many key defenders in the off-season. Ravens could just be a one week wonder just warming up versus the junior varsity team in South Beach. But we give them the number four slot for putting up 59 big ones on the score board.

#5.MINNESOTA VIKINGS 1-0 Is Gary Kubiak the answer to all of the Minnesota Vikings’ problems from last season? Week one the Vikings looked like that sexy pick from last season which we know that went wrong. Each game last season, in the back of your head you thought “This is the week the Vikings will turn it around.” Never happened. In the NFL these things happen all the time where teams one year make it to the playoffs, and then they have a harder schedule and they fall off the map with expectations. Could the Vikings be back and the Bears follow that same beaten path the Vikes did last season?

#6. PHILADELPHIA EAGLES 1-0 Eagles fans were probably swearing their heads off yelling about them trading away Nick Foles in the off-season, when the Skins pounced on their team very early in the game. Eagles soared high in the second half, came back and knocked off the Skins for their first victory of the season. Carson Wentz to old and now new Eagle DeSean Jackson looks like a legit deep threat tandem as the league should be aware of this combo.

#7. LA CHARGERS 1-0 Is Melvin Gordon one of the Expendables?

No, just another disgruntled running back in the NFL. His replacement did very well as the Chargers are well stocked in their overall roster to get back to the playoffs and perhaps Rivers will get this team further in the playoffs. I liked this team last year with its ability to win on the road. Perhaps the Chargers with their play may get that cult following like the movie Red Dawn did. Chargers still looking for a fan base. The personals and classified ads have not worked. Maybe the penny saver will help them scrap a fan core together.

#8.DALLAS COWBOYS 1-0 Not sure I want to say… HOW ABOUT THOSE COWBOYS!!! They of course beat up the Giants in week one. Again they played the Giants. The Cowboys with Kellen Moore calling the plays looked impressive. Ezekiel Elliot played well as he held out all pre-season. You can say that about the whole league as none of these teams played their starters hardly. The Cowboy defense looks great. This is a team with some great talent on both sides of the ball. The question I have is… When will Coach Jason Garrett and team owner Jerry Jones screw things up?

#9.LA RAMS 1-0 Are the Rams a better defense without Suh and the addition of Clay Matthews? It was good see the Rams offense back to their old tricks which disappeared in the Superbowl. With a healthy Todd Gurley and Cooper Kupp, two big ingredients that make this Rams team dangerous on offense. Obviously they need to stay healthy. This year the Rams are not jumping out at me as one of the elite teams in the league. They beat Carolina, but the soft cookie at quarterback for the Panthers still made it a close game at the end. This week I want to see how the Rams do against the Saints to see if this team is still a vital threat in the league.

#10.TENNESSEE TITANS 1-0 The Browns were supposed to be for real. The Titans surprised me with their performance bringing the country to the rock-n-roll dawg pound. The return of Delanie Walker helped bring out an old version of Marcus Mariota that we have not seen in awhile. A version which many had high hopes for, his rookie year. Titans’ defense has always been pretty good. You have to love Derrick Henry as he continues to show he is one of the NFL top running backs.

#11.SEATTLE SEAHAWKS 1-0 Seahawks win at home, no shock in a snoozer of a game. A win is still a win even though they played the bumbles with a rash of injuries in Cincinnati on the offensive side of the ball. Like the Clowney trade which will improve an already talented defense. Want to see what the Seahawks do on the road; it is the biggest question and concern for this team.

Will they show two sides this season on the road and home? I have to believe under Pete Carol’s skin is an alien being like in the show, V. He skin grafts his face before every game not to show his two face alien V complexion. As he hugs his players and chews the heads off their pets for not playing well.

#12.GREEN BAY PACKERS 1-0 Did the Packers defense improve that much or is the league caught up to the Bears offense that looked horrible? The Packers won their first game on the road. Aaron Rodgers made two lucky throws in this one to help their team get 10 points to beat the Bears. I have to see more to really see what this Packer team is all about with their new head coach. With their new defense. With Rodgers having more freedom to call his own plays.

#13.CHICAGO BEARS 0-1 THE STORY IN CHICAGO IS THE TALE OF TWO CITIES.

THE BEARS DEFENSE

THE BEARS OFFENSE

ANY QUESTIONS?

#14.HOUSTON TEXANS 0-1 Texans went into New Orleans and almost came out with a big victory in week one. My first question is why they played a soft prevent defense on the last drive where Drew Brees drove down field and got his team set up for a winning field goal. Plus trading Jadeveon Clowny to Seattle… couldn’t they use a guy to make a big play at the end of a game against New Orleans? Deshaun Watson looked awesome. Houston will have a BIG PROBLEM if they keep letting him get hit all the time. You can’t protect Watson. Your play calling on defense is terrible. You traded away what might be your best defensive player on the team. If this goes south, I blame management..

#15.INDIANAPOLIS COLTS 0-1 It sucks the Colts lost Andrew Luck to an early retirement. This team has a great roster. They played tough against the Chargers. They could easily be 1-0 right now. You have to love Marlon Mack, a quarterback’s best friend, especially a guy like Jacoby Brissett who is the man behind center. Jacoby Brissett is not a terrible quarterback. He has some seasoning in this league with games under his belt. The Colts defense is solid. If Brissett does not turn over the ball and he gets the solid running game, this team has a chance to win their division.

#16.CLEVELAND BROWNS 0-1 Many people had the Browns as their sexy pick of this season. One bad game is not fair to judge this team with the talent they have. I will ask, Did they hire the right coach? Many stupid penalties. They looked like a bad Raiders team throughout their first game. Plus you have to hope this team does not have too many personalities with their top players.

As time goes on during this season we will find out if they have the right guy coaching this team. Because if losses pile up, this team can get Antonio Brown ugly.

#17.SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS 1-0 Is the 49ers defense for really? Or does playing Jameis Winston in week one make any unit a stellar unit? Two pick sixes for the Niners. Quarterback Jimmy Garoppolo made it through the game without an injury. Every team has their own recipe for winning. This may be the 49ers only way.

#18.BUFFALO BILLS 1-0 Bills make a nice comeback after they dug themselves a hole playing the Jets. Bills have assembled a very talented roster. Love the defense, one of the best in the NFL. Josh Allen has to limit his mistakes. I will give credit to Josh Allen for rallying the team in the comeback as they were down 16-3 late in the game. Buffalo will be a very exciting team to watch this season.

#19.OAKLAND RAIDERS 1-0 I will say after week one, Jon Gruden looks to be the better coach in his own family over his brother in Washington. The Raiders you could say they played Joe Flacco, a veteran quarterback who is terrible at in his old age. In the last Monday night game in Oakland. Plus it could be the last ever NFL game played in a baseball stadium, and the Raiders looked impressive. Looked like the old kings of Monday night. Derrick Carr looked like his old self a few years back when they made the playoffs. Plus the Raiders played well despite all the Antonio Brown drama. Good to see the fans at the Black Hole pay their respects to Antonio Clown.

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#20.TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS 1-1 You knew when the Buccaneers hired Bruce Arians he was going to get his old band back together. He got his former defensive cordinator Todd Bowles back. Just like the good ole days in Arizona. I like that Todd Bowles has gotten that Buccaneer defense straightened out which was huge problem for Tampa Bay last season. With Jameis Winston at quarterback your team will have to deal with mistakes. A good defense in place can help your quarterbacks stupid play. The Buccaneers could easily be 2-0. The first game with two pick sixes to the 49ers is what killed them.

#21.ARIZONA CARDINALS 0-0-1 The Kyler Murray ERA did not start off with a bang. However it ended with a bang, and not a whimper. Murray brought the Cardinals back in a game many thought the Lions had with a good lead. You could say they played the Lions. Lions are not a pushover. You can say the Lions are not a smart team. See their head coach for that. Give Murray credit, he threw two touchdown passes and passed for over 300 yards in his NFL debut. Cardinals were wise in bringing Larry Fitzgerald back. A very nice security blanket to have for the young rookie. Cardinals have a pretty good defense even with a few big names out of line up in week one. The Cardinals will be exciting to watch just to see how Kyler Murray’s play pans out throughout the season

#22. JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS 0-1

Doug Moronie, head coach of the Jags, has declared fargin war!!!!

With a roster full of ice holes. The Nick Foles ERA quickly over. Now they have to rely on rookie quarterback.

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Jacksonville fans may need more drugs to watch this season unfold. Can you say it’s going to get better?

#23.CAROLINA PANTHERS 0-2 Does not shock me to see the Panthers 0-2 already. Poor Ron Rivera, the head coach of the Panthers, has a solid defense. But he has his career hitched to a cookie. Panthers had chances to win both games as both games were close in score. The day when Cam Newton in the Superbowl did not jump on that loose football in a very big game, shows me he will never win. He might be a great fantasy quarterback for your team. You could say that about their runningback Christian McCaffrey as well. I don’t see the Panthers doing anything this season. They have to go in another direction. The Newton thing is not working. How many excuses can they keep coming up with?

#24.CINCINNATI BENGALS 0-1 The new leader of the Bengals, Zac Taylor, who comes off the Rams head coaching tree, his first task was playing on the road in Seattle. Some key players on offense hurt. But the Bengals played the Seahawks tough and gave them a game to lose only by one point. Will the Sean McVay tree have strong limbs?

Or will it be another “Good Grief” style of Christmas in Cincinnati with this team.

#25.ATLANTA FALCONS 0-1 Some reason I thought the Falcons were going to be better. Not sure why as I might have fallen asleep at the wheel on that thought. So much talent on offense. Matt Ryan is making poor decisions especially in the red zone. Their defense is healthy, but play like they are swiss cheese with lots of holes for running backs to go through. I’d rather go back and watch the Atlanta Legend team from the AAF than the Falcons right now.

#26.PITTSBURGH STEELERS 0-1 Some experts think the Steelers will thrive this season. You can say that the soap opera for the time being is over. With Big Ben and Coach Mike Tomlin, who will emerge as the next Dr. Ramoray?

I think the Steelers soap opera will open a new season when the struggles are seen on a week to week basis with this team. Versus the Patriots they looked very bad. Mike Tomlin is a defensive minded coach, but his unit is like the lady from the old Wendy’s commercials?

Instead of where’s the beef, where is that steel curtain defense that has been lacking for years now.

#27.DENVER BRONCOS 0-1 Joe Flacco is awful. He reminds me of Jay Cutler in a huddle he does not command. He does not show any emotion. He does not inspire anybody around him. He just wants to get paid and thinks everyone else is doing something wrong around him if he plays bad. I think Vic Fangio will get the Broncos defense to play at a higher level. I would immediately bench Flacco and save your season, put in the rookie Brandon Allen.

#28.NEW YORK JETS 0-1 The Jets had a nice lead in the second half to then see the Buffalo Bills come back in a stampede to take the game. Jets have some nice pieces. They have a new coach. They have a young quarterback still developing. This will be a team that gets better as the season goes on. Look for Sam Darnold to play at the next level at some point this season. He had some flashes last year that makes you believe he will be the man behind center for the Jets for a long time.

#29.WASHINGTON REDSKINS 0-1 The Skins have an old man at running back. A healthy scratch in week one for Adrian Peterson. They are relying on Case Keenum, a one year wonder from that magical year in Minnesota. They had a commanding lead over the Eagles last week in the first half which resulted in a Philadelphia comeback. My bet is Jay Gruden will be the first Gruden fired on my Gruden watch. Has the Dwayne Haskins chatter started yet ?

#30.NEW YORK GIANTS 1-0 I thought the Giants would play better than they did versus the Cowboys. My first thought is without Odell Beckham Jr. this team would have no distractions. When Beckham got hurt late in the season last year, the Giants offense were moving the ball very well. Eli Manning is a very durable quarterback as he takes the snaps every week. The Giants drafted a quarterback for the future which I thought would have Manning play better. It’s going to be a very long season in New York with an offense that has to come from behind every game. They have no defense. Just turnstyles for teams to exploit. The Giants remind me of that one neighborhood gal when you were younger who everyone kissed first, because like the defense she was easy to score upon.

#31.DETROIT LIONS 0-0-1 If I was a Lions fan I would be pissed off. To see your team build a nice comfy lead against the Cardinals who are starting a rookie quarterback, then see this lead evaporate. How long has Matthew Stafford been in the league? He may be a decent fantasy quarterback option but isn’t it time for this guy to take this team on his shoulders and guide his team to the playoffs consistently? The fat bearded man, former disciple of the Patriots, to me is not the coaching solution. Lions are in a tough division as well. It’s time to come up with a new plan in motor city. It’s not working…

#32.MIAMI DOLPHINS 0-1 Last week the Dolphins players led the league in calls to their agents. Every player on the Miami roster after the Ravens gutted them and left them on south beach last Sunday wants out including the water boy.

We do not claim we are football experts. However, in the NFL, do you really need to be an expert at picking games? You can throw logic right out the window in most match-ups and get them right. You can pick out of a hat and be right. I will even go the opposite in my thinking like George Costanza, and be right. The Wild Shamrock way is all of the above styles of picking. Perhaps throwing a dart on the city and going that way. Beers will be had. We will come up with a few good weeks like most people that do pick- em leagues.. However we will look very bad in weeks as well. You can bet the opposite on us and probably do very well. But you never know as you are warned…

Thursday night it was not the Bears kicking game that cost them. It was their offense.

PACKERS VERSUS BEARS (THURSDAY)

OUR PICK: BEARS

Already we are 0-1 to start the season as the Packers went into Chicago and won a lifeless style of game as the Bears’ new kicker was the only offense the Bears could muster up.

THE SUNDAY SLATE

REDSKINS VERSUS EAGLES

Getting rid of Nick Foles means Carson Wentz has lots to prove this season. The Eagles are looking to soar and get back to the Superbowl. They have done a lot of retooling to the roster. Redskins will encounter with one year wonder, “Vanilla Ice” Case Keenum. The Skins hope Case finds that magic he had in Minnesota.

OUR PICK: THE EAGLES

I think the Skins offense sputters. I think the Eagles offense are too talented for the Skins. The key will be the Skins defense staying on the field too long as their offense has too many three and outs.

BILLS AT JETS

Jets have a new head coach. former Dolphins head coach, Adam Gase. They also unveil their million dollar weapon In Le’Veon Bell, former Steeler hold out. Bills come in with no Nathan Peterman. They have revamped their offense gutting the old one. New receiving core. They have more depth to the defense.

OUR PICK:BILLS

I think the Jets still have too many holes on this roster. I like how Josh Allen is taking his play to the next level. The Bills defense is better than the playoff defense they had two seasons ago. I like Coach McDermott over Coach Gase any day which will be the difference.

FALCONS AT VIKINGS

These are two teams that took a major step backwards last season. Vikings were everyone’s sexy pick last season. The Falcons defense was in shambles last season, riddled with injuries.

OUR PICK:FALCONS

Burned too many times by the Vikings last season. Experts are jumping on their band wagon once again. The Falcons are very familiar playing in domes which help them prevail in week one, in a shootout road win in week one.

RAVENS AND DOLPHINS

It’s Lamar Jackson’s team in Baltimore. Dolphins are hoping Fitzmagic is the key to victory. Dolphins cut ties with most of their talented veterans in the off season. Ravens lost a few defensive pieces as well.

OUR PICK: RAVENS

I think Ravens still have enough of a defense to stop the Dolphins attack. I think it will be a close game. I think Lamar Jackson and that running attack will eventually wear down the Dolphin defense and pull out a hard fought victory on the road.

CHIEFS AT JAGUARS

Could this be that number one defense versus the number one offense? The Jags have Nick “the Dick” Foles as their quarterback.

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Lets not forget about the Chiefs’ Patrick Mahomes. Whether or not the Chiefs improve that defense is a big question.

OUR PICK:CHIEFS

Nick Foles is a big upgrade from Bortles. I think he goes back to the Rams’ Nick Foles. Patrick Mahomes and that Chiefs offense is way too talented to be stopped the whole game. Andy Reid’s superior coaching over a Doug Marone.

TITANS AT BROWNS

The Browns had one hell of an off-season. Plus with the play of that team in in the second half, people in Cleveland will be very excited. The Tennessee Tuxedos have a stud running back named Derrick Henry.

OUR PICK:BROWNS

The dog pound goes wild as CLEVELAND ROCKS with their new dog Odell Beckham finding the fire hydrant in the end zone. Browns defense makes an early statement. Marcus Marriota struggles as the old Dolphin back up will be thrown in the mix very early on this season.

RAMS AT PANTHERS

Panthers want to get the ball to their running back way more than last year. Can Christian McCaffrey take on a bigger load? After the Rams mugged their way to the Superbowl, they followed that up with a loss to the Evil Empire. Can the Rams rebound?

OUR PICK:RAMS

In big games, Panther QB Fig Newton will crumble as usual. Rams defense will stymie the Panthers offense. Rams will get back on track with their offense and take one on the road.

BENGALS VERSUS SEAHAWKS

Bengals started the season off very well last season. However they quickly turned back into the bumbles. Seahawks add Jadeveon Clowny to the mix on defense. After Which they already established a pretty good defense last season.

OUR PICK: SEAHAWKS

Seahawks at home. Russell Wilson. Clowney will make some kind of impact play and Seahawks dismantle the Bengals with ease. The Bengals new coach will find out how much more work he has to do in this contest.

49ers AT BUCCANEERS

Can Jimmy Garoppolo stay upright and stay on the field? Looks like Jameis Winston has not taken any off-season Uber rides. The Buccaneers have a new leader on the sidelines in Bruce Arians. The Buccaneers added some pieces to the defense in Gerald McCoy and the sportsmanship of the year award in Ndamukong Suh.

OUR PICK:BUCCANEERS

Bruce Arians will straighten out the Buccaneer offense that has a ton of talent. I think Winston will respond better to his new coach who gets respect from all his players. 49ers coming across country will not help them in this one, another key to this contest.

COLTS AT CHARGERS

Andrew Luck shocks the world with an early retirement. Originally the Colts were going with Jacoby Brissett week, one due to Andrew Luck’s injury. Does Andrew Luck’s retirement let the sails out of the Colts season? Chargers went deep in the playoffs last season and then were humiliated by the Patriots. Chargers have a ton of talent on both sides of the ball.

OUR PICK:CHARGERS

Even though Chargers were better on the road than home. Even though the opponent fans take up more seats then the Chargers’ faithful five people. I still like the Chargers in this match up. Colts are talented, but Jacoby Brissett will need time to get his feet wet in the starting role right from the start of the season. Chargers have the Superbowl on their minds. As this team might be the best Phillip Rivers ever had.

GIANTS AT COWBOYS

Everyone wants to see the money, Jerry, in Dallas. Cowboys finally got their holdout star running back in the mix a few days ago with a new contract. Did the Giants get rid of their cancer in Odell Beckham Jr. in the off-season. How long will Eli Manning look over his shoulder? Will the Giants pull the Manning cord out of the wall and end his Giants career for their new drafted QB?

OUR PICK: GIANTS

I like the Giants in a big upset in week one. I think with the Giants drafting a quarterback, it will improve Eli’s overall game. I think the Giants offense were playing better without Odell Beckham last season when he was hurt. Cowboys are making too many headlines in contract extensions. This will stumble the Cowboys out of the gate.

LIONS AT ARIZONA

Cardinals unleash Kyle Murray. Can new head coach of the Cardinals, Kliff Kingsbury, get Murray to play like Patrick Mahomes who he coached in college? It’s year two for the New England disciple Matt Patricia. Will his Lions defense improve from year one? Can Matthew Stafford lead this Lion franchise to the promised land eventually?

OUR PICK: LIONS

I think Kyle Murray will show some flashes of excellence and his future ability in this game. It will be the mistakes that cost the Cardinals the game. With a pretty good Lions defense, forcing Murray into trouble will be the key to Lions winning on the road.

STEELERS AT PATRIOTS

Is the All My Children soap opera over in Pittsburgh? Is it Big Ben that causes this? Can JU JU be the number one Guy? The Evil Empire at home defending their Super Bowl title. Brand new season. Tom Brady wants to be the best ever in the galaxy.

OUR PICK: THE DARK SIDE (PATRIOTS)

Pittsburgh has not done well on the road especially last season. The Patriots’ plan is always better than what Steelers come up with. Steelers got rid of the trouble makers in the locker room. However Coach Tomlin is still there and he is a major problem. He’s why this team will not win the big games especially against the Evil Empire genius, the man in the hooded sweatshirt.

TEXANS AT SAINTS

Saints were robbed in the championship game. This prevented them from getting in the Superbowl. Did the Texans get rid of the right defensive bookend? Will JJ Watt stay healthy for two seasons in a row?

OUR PICK: SAINTS

Saints at home on Monday Night is a great recipe for a Saint victory to start the season. Texans started off very poorly last season. Plus, they finished very poorly. Trying to beat the Saints at home is like playing a different animal. Especially the Saints who will be out to wash the bad taste out of their mouths from the NFC championship.

BRONCOS AT RAIDERS

Vic Fangio, the new Broncos leader, will turn their defense around. Joe Flacco is on Mission from GOD. Meanwhile Raiders have loaded up with an ugly cast of characters.

OUR PICK:BRONCOS

I just can’t see Jon Gruden having this cast from the Road Warrior in check, in week one. I think Vic Fangio will bring a defense like the Broncos had in the Superbowl a few years back. Look at what he did for the Bears. Von Miller will wreck havoc on the Raiders. Flacco will make a few good throws. Nothing exciting in a close game. Raiders are bound to make too many mistakes in this one giving the Broncos their first victory of the year.

WEEK ONE BLOW IT UP

Dead from the neck up is back. In 2018, we wrote a few segments of “Dead From the Neck Up,” which is all about the NFL’S greatest citizens. About players with the porch light on, but no one is home. From the kneelers to the lowest pond scum who beat on women. Then the ones that just had their bell rung way too much. Plus the ones that think they are way too big for their team and play for themselves. The ones that do not play for the name of their jersey. The ones that play for themselves. In the NFL, the well never runs dry as players get their stupid on every day.

THE MEAT HEAD OF THE WEEK

ANTONIO BROWN OAKLAND RAIDERS

Antonio Brown, most will say, is one of the best receivers in the league. Since late last season for the Pittsburgh Steelers, Brown has brought on more STUPID than catches. Brown’s feud with Big Ben Roethlisberger and the Steelers brass, got the team to trade him in the off-season. Antonio Brown then did not like his first destination, which was Buffalo. Certain cities Brown wanted to play for or he simply quit. The Steeler and Bills trade was quickly nixed. Antonio Brown demanded a trade and now held the Steelers hostage from getting the best deal. Finally the Steelers got rid of their problem and came up with a deal with the Raiders.

You’d think Antonio Brown would fit perfectly in Oakland. The team as assembled, seemed like a cast of characters from the movie, The Road Warrior. Modern family with a team and coach that makes a perfect dysfunctional unit. Raiders last season were followed by dark clouds everywhere they went as they got rid of their impact players for number one draft picks. The Raiders then cleared a lot of big time salary and they went out on a shopping spree. They landed Brown from Pittsburgh and they knew his baggage along with his performance on the field.

Perhaps it was all Big Ben’s fault in Steeler country. Throw that theory out the window because Brown coming to Oakland has been like the circus coming to town. Antonio was the side show Brown. He refused to wear the new mandatory helmet that the NFL changed to. This resulted in a tantrum as Brown wanted to take his old helmet home crying to mommy, and threatened to quit once again. Then Antonio Brown somehow got frost bite on his feet. This resulted in not wearing the proper PPE, proper protection equipment. The frost bite did not occur from a vacation to Buffalo. France!!!! In a session of Crytotherapy. Not the right footwear in the cryo chamber. You can’t make this stuff up.

FROST BITTEN FEET

The final act which had Antonio Brown not going to play opening night versus Denver, was the heated argument he had with the Raiders GM. Brown called Mike Mayock the “C” word…

Yes, Brown used the C word which is hard for me and my family hearing cracker. WE PREFER…….

Antonio Brown then has his tantrum and went storming off. This time he unfriended all the Silver and Black from facebook. He is un-following his quarterback Derek Carr on the Twitter tweeter. The Fiddle faddle of the world. Peace and love are back in the Raider locker room as Antonio Brown took his Terrell Owens meds and apologized for his outbursts. Jon Gruden talks very slowly to Antonio, as he will play this Monday night versus the Broncos.

Antonio Brown, that jive ass TURKEY with no brains, is our MEAT HEAD OF THE WEEK.

DARK HELMET IS DEAD FROM THE NECK UP……..

It’s a week where all NFL teams are doing the final touches on their own rosters to get ready for the 2019 season next weekend. Players on the bubble find out their destiny… if their NFL dreams will play out. Some players will make the practice squad. A pool of players will be sent home and most of them will have to find new work. This group of castoffs could still have their football dreams stay alive and get scooped up by the XFL. Canada and Arena leagues already established could be ideas to still play football. The AAF had many NFL castoffs and lots of young talent that played solid football before the league folded. Many of the AAF players were picked up by NFL teams. Could the XFL be the same way?

In the 90’s Vince McMahon launched his first football league. All the team names were intimidating, like the Demons, Hitmen, Rage, Berzerk, Enforcers, and Outlaws. They had logos like a crazy person in the rubber room would draw.

Vince McMahon’s league in the 90’s was a mixed version of football and wrestling. He had wrestlers doing the play by play in the TV booth. Instead of a coin flip, they had a mad scramble for the ball. Resulted in the first week a player getting injured and dislocating his shoulder. On the back of the jerseys, players got to write nick names. Rod Smart was well known around the league as he had, “HE HATE ME” on the back of his jersey. The league was trying to be tougher than any other league, like no fair catches. Less penalties. Back then the league had a mix of NFL players that you remembered like all these leagues have. Players look for a second shot to get back to the NFL. Sometimes I think players want to actually play the game and not just ride the bench in the NFL.The pay structure was interesting because if you won games, you would be paid more. They had a base salary, but to make more money you needed to win and hit bonuses for your own play. All this crazy lasted for one year. They did play the whole season and the playoffs, not like the AAF just earlier this year.

Vince McMahon in part two of his XFL, promises his league will be about the product on the field. Playing the game of football. The AAF had that down to a science, as the season went on the games got better. The AAF had some stupid rules like how many you can blitz and no kickoffs. The XFL has not completed their new rule books. I’m sure they might have some of their own rules which could be stupid or perhaps a good thing. They too want to speed up the game. In football, hearing that baffles me. Less commericals is the solution, not play clocks. We don’t need a drive thru football game.

The XFL had eight cities, now they have 8 cities with nick names as things are heating up as the season is getting closer.

Dallas Renegades, DC Defenders, Houston Roughnecks, LA Wild Cats, New York Guardians, Seattle Dragons, St.Louis Battle Hawks, and the Tampa Bay Vipers. I like all these logos better than the crap they used in the 1990’s.

The Renegades looks very familiar as the old Dallas team from the arena league. The Defenders looks like a Captain America shield. I’d rather see the old Atari game called Defender where the city blows up.

Houston Roughnecks looks like resurrection of the old Houston Oilers.

The LA. Wild Cats, I have to think of Goldie Hawn in the movie Wildcats .

Of course LA does it’s normal lettering of L & A, real geniuses there.

What is a New York Guardian?

Could a Guardian be the key master or the gate keeper?

Seattle Dragons is the monster from Great Lakes brewing.

Maybe the beast swam from Cleveland to Seattle.

St.Louis Battle Hawks reminds me of the cone of silence.

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Somebody tell Control headquarters Ziggy is alive, running a football team in St. Louis and Kaos is planning something big.

Tampa Bay Vipers has to have the Cobra Commander as their owner.

All the logos are ten times better than any of the ones from the 1990s.

The XFL already has their first Gunslinger signed, Landry Jones, former Big Ben back up in Steel Country.

You think Landry Jones should be on a NFL roster. My conclusion is the man wants to play football, not watch his career go by backing up Big Ben in Pittsburgh. These next few weeks the XFL will be starting to pick off the scrap heap of players that the NFL does not need.

Hopefully Vince McMahon has learned from his first go around not to mix oil and water. Wrestling and football do not mix. Hopefully he has learned to have money in the bank for the long haul of the season, so they do not have any AAF reruns. Vince McMahon says he has enough money for three football seasons. We will believe it when we see it. If they keep it simple and just play the game of football, they should have no problems. I will be watching and then waiting. If this thing is a success, I expect to be paid and awarded a team in Chicago.

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Last Saturday, I had the Chicago Bears preseason game on in the background at one of my summer parties. I had the volume down as music was playing and people were conversing. Drinking a few beers as you glance up at the preseason football, does not mean nothing. It was the news scrolling on the bottom of the screen that made you jump off your seat. Twenty nine year old Andrew Luck hanging up the spikes for the Indianapolis Colts. If you drafted him on your fantasy team, you are checking the waiver wire learning this information. Andrew Luck might not be in my top five quarterbacks of the league. I would say he lands in the top ten passers of the league. To walk away from the millions of dollars on the table. To walk away from a team that the ceiling is very high on it’s future. Is this the smart decision overall? Many people from all over have chimed in and thrown their two cents into the ring about his choice to walk away. Who is right and who is wrong ?

The Indianapolis Colts let Peyton Manning walk out of their lives because of an injury to his neck that sidelined him for a whole season. The reason the Colts let Manning walk was drafting Andrew Luck, number one overall. Peyton Manning went to the Broncos and ended up winning another Super Bowl. Andrew Luck came into the league and did very well. In a six year career coming out of Stanford, Luck has thrown 171 touchdown passes. Only 83 interceptions which is great ratio. He passed for 23,671 yards with a QB rating at 89.5 for his career. He has a winning record behind center for the Indianapolis Colts going 53 -33 for his career. He has an even record at 4-4 in the playoffs over that six year span.

Why is Andrew Luck walking away from a game where he is well paid and which he is pretty good at? In football, it comes down to injuries. Andrew Luck was the comeback player of the year last season as he was inactive for the whole 2017 season dealing with an injury. Like all football players he has dealt with concussions as that is the norm in the NFL. To his list of battle wounds comes a torn labrum and lacerated kidney. This year he was dealing with some leg issues. Let’s not forget the mental part of the game as it can take a toll on your body, just as bad as the physical. Plus as a quarterback all the hits you take back there as you’re constantly peeling yourself off the carpet in a 4 quarter game.

Many are outraged that Luck is walking away from the game because of his timing. Two week before the season is going to start, it puts the Colts in a difficult situation trying to find a replacement. Andrew Luck was in doubt to start the season, as the job was going to Jacoby Brissett, who has some seasoning in the NFL over the last few seasons. They were hoping Brissett could win a few games while Andrew Luck got healthy and then pass on the torch when he came back. It is a solid plan for a very solid team.They had hopes on improving themselves as they made the playoffs last season and made it to the second round. Now some people are lashing out with Luck walking away from a bright future with the Indianapolis Colts.

To walk away from a very successful career is mind blowing. It comes down to what the body is saying. If the body is saying it cant take another NFL season, it’s time to walk away. The timing sucks but it’s a very difficult decision to make. If Andrew Luck went out on the field and went through the motions or even seriously hurt himself even more, then what would the haters say then? Guys like Steve Beuerlein, who I used to like, threw his two cents in the ring. It’s not his mind or body, so who is he to speak about someone else’s decision. Glad Beuerlein played many years in the NFL. Half of them holding a clipboard.

Andrew Luck left about 60 Million dollars on the table walking away with his current contract. Jim Irsay, the owner of the Colts, estimated Luck would have earned 450 million dollars if he continued to play, let’s say another ten years. That is a lot of cheddar. However if your mind becomes nothing but mush, how will you enjoy that money. Sure it’s great for his family’s future, but this is a guy who graduated from Stanford University. This is a guy that did not take stupid football classes. Andrew Luck loves to read and is very interested in architecture. He could be building communities for your children in the future. Luck has made very nice money playing in the NFL for six seasons. He has many highlights as well. To walk away from the game you loved and be able to walk and function and pass on money is both insane and genius. It’s his decision. Everyone has a new chapter in life at some point and Andrew Luck is turning the page. It sucks for the Colts. But he gave you everything he had. This is not take the money and run. This is a guy that has other things to do in life. Fans need to respect what’s in the man’s heart and let him walk away in the sunset. The Colts will have another day, another season when a new guy will lead them back into the promised land. Maybe it will be Jacoby Brissett.

The Philadelphia Eagles ran into some injuries this preseason with their back up quarterback. A position that was held by Nick Foles. We all know what he did and we know the Eagles need a good back-up with their number one not being able to go the distance.The Eagles persuaded Josh McCown to come out of retirement to take over the back up duties. Then a question came from a reporter asking the Eagles brass if they called Colin Kaepernick for a try out. Here we go again, not even into the 2019 regular season and people will continue to think Kaepernick is some kind of Jesus sent down from earth to save the day. Last Saturday when Andrew Luck suddenly retired, the small cult of Kaepernick followers were already envisioning their guy dressed in a horseshoe helmet. Can we end this tom foolery and close the book about Colin Kaepernick? Because to me, the guy does not want to step back on the field.

It’s been three years since Colin Kaepernick suited up and played football. Since that time he has had some back-up opportunities in the NFL. He has refused them as he wants to be a starter in the NFL. Was he blackballed from the NFL? The NFL awarded him a big sum of money not to take it to court. The amount is unknown. We know Colin Kaepernick has gotten money from NIKE as he did an ad campaign. Obviously the man is not hurting for cash. Even though he tried to swindle 20 million dollars from the AAF, that did not have that kind loot saved up in their piggy bank. The AAF was an opportunity for Kaepernick to get on the field and show people his skills. Saying 20 million to that league, he knew they would move on as they did and they folded with the regular season still going.

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In the movie Best of Times, Kurt Russell played a guy in a small town who was the local high school starting quarterback when he attended. He was the greatest quarterback that town had ever seen. Due to a knee injury, his college and maybe pro dreams were derailed. Derailed his key to get out of that small town, as well. He did not want to play a rematch football game with the next town over that took place 20 years after his career in high school. He did not want to play because he was afraid he would be bad. He thought he would tarnish maybe the only thing he had going for him, those old football stories. Those games he played as years passed, the number of touchdown passes he threw went up like an old fisherman story about catching the biggest fish ever.

If Kaepernick does play again, would it ruin his legacy on the field? It’s been three years since he played last. Is he afraid taking a back-up job might lead to him getting a chance to get on the field and do poorly? If he plays poorly, his cult following immediately goes away. The haters would be very happy. His lost causes would no longer have that pep in their step. He would no longer have stories written about him about, ‘what if’ ? Someone would call the guy to clear away the junk and throw Colin Kaepernick in the landfill with the Ryan Leafs of the world, that have attempted to try to be a quarterback but turned out to be just a pile of rubbish.

To me, Colin Kaepernick is a one year wonder. He vultured the opportunity when Alex Smith of the 49ers got hurt. Alex Smith had the car to the playoffs. Colin Kaepernick is 28-30 as a starter in the NFL. You could say Josh McCown has a worse record as a quarterback than Kaepernick. Josh McCown is playing for the team name on the jersey. While Kaepernick has the team name on his back. Has his name on the front. Plus the NFL defenses always catche up to run first minded quarterbacks. When Colin Kaepernick has to stand in pocket and throw, he is horrible. If I was any team in the NFL, I’d stay away from the cancer that would plague your locker room with all his stances that result in kneeling. Plus he has not played in three years. I would not give him three beans for a cow. Colin should go to the XFL and play and prove his way back to the NFL that he can still play. See on the field that he has the desire to play. See if he can lead a team up and down the field. In the grand scheme of things, the man under the afro is holding onto a football rep that many are still blinded by. Why play football and lose money from all the other avenues he has going on? Enough is enough. Can we please close the book on Kaepernick and throw it in the fire place and quit mentioning his name every time a quarterback gets hurt?

When I first heard the news of the Chicago Blackhawks traded Artem Anisimov to the Ottawa Senators, it was a head scratcher. Then it’s an even swap for a guy who only scored 14 goals in the last two seasons. My reaction was, “What are the Blackhawks trying to accomplish? Plus it’s a swap of offensive players when we the Blackhawks, need help on defense. Maybe another goalie to go with the unpredictable Cory Crawford with his battles with concussions. Then the thoughts of when the Blackhawks got rid of Artemi Panarin, an up-and-coming superstar of the NHL, came racing inside my mind. What does Zack Smith of the Senators offer, that Anisimov does not?

The first thing about this trade is, it is a salary dump for the Chicago Blackhawks. This is not a new thing for the Hawks either. They are paying their core of the past, some big money still from winning those Stanley Cups. They have no trade clauses. Some of them are not pulling their own weight. Some of them are ageless. This trade gives the Blackhawks 1.3 million to work with. This money can help them keep restricted free agent, Brendan Perlini. Perhaps money left over can go into more moves to improve the depth of this roster.

They look like they are trying to go a different direction with their roster this season since they missed the playoffs again. Toughness might be the ONE GOAL this season. Reacquiring Andrew Shaw. Now adding a physical type of player in Zack Smith. Zack gets in on the forecheck in his game. He is terrific with the face off. Career-wise he is at 50.7% percent while Anisimov is at 45.9% on face off battles. Zack Smith played his whole career in Ottawa as he was the 3rd pick in 2008. Zack tallied 9 goals with 19 assists last season. In his career he has 94 goals with 99 assists in 612 games.

Artem Anisimov came to the Hawks in the 2015-16 season. He is 31 years old. He scored 20 or more goals for the Black Hawks in 3 out of the 4 seasons playing in Chicago. Artem’s best season was the 2016-17 season where he notched 22 goals and dealt out 23 assists. Last season when the team was an offensive juggernaut, he only had 15 tallies. He did have 23 assists. Is it safe to say Artem Anisimov’s play is on the decline? Numbers don’t lie, but playing on different lines can make your numbers explode off the charts or drop like a ton of bricks.

This move does many things for the Blackhawks. Obviously it frees up salary and gets you money you need to spend in other areas. Trading Artem Anisimov when he has a higher ceiling point to get you something in return is huge. With the emergence of Dylan Strome, he could be the X-factor that makes people forget about Artem Anisimov. I think Zack Smith can offer the team more versatility. In the 2015-17 season, Zack Smith tallied 14 goals playing with a better line that season, his far best year in his career. His numbers could go up playing with Toews or Kane. The thing the Hawks have lacked over the years is toughness. Getting guys like Andrew Shaw and now Zack Smith that can play hard nose hockey and do the little things. These guys can create some magic on the ice and pick the puck away from their opponents. Give the big dogs more opportunities and more shots on goals. Artem Anisimov was a nice player to have, but I think the Blackhawks have too many of his type. Now let’s hope the team can shore up things on the defensive side.